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Tue May 20, 2008 6:39 am

So I had an age-related revelation of great irony last night - my wife and baby were out shopping with her mom, so I had the place to myself...put in a cd of old Bon Scott AC/DC high voltage max power rock n roll, and cranked it up - I was totally rockin' out...
I then proceeded to go to the baby's room and get the aromatically full hamper of poopy cloth diapers, took it to the bathroom, and got down to hosing them off into the toilet for the pre-wash before they go in the washer...my mind avoiding focusing on what I was actually doing, guitars wailing in the background, I was struck by several things:
-a very funny vision of Angus Young, in full schoolboy uniform, changing a very full diaper...
-the constant question of what terrible process sweet innocent babies use to transform something as clean and pure as mother's milk into something so chunkily terrible, in hideous shades ranging from putrid yellow, to foul muddy brown, to a green so vivid that I doubt I can eat indian food again without second thoughts...
-and finally, and perhaps most importantly, the cruel irony of the fact that here I had the house to myself, had already started the loud raucus rock n roll party, and then proceeded to do somthing so very un-rock n roll that I was forced to shudder at all the implications of where my life had come to and all these signs pointing at (gasp) adulthood, maturity, and several other dirty words...
:)
It was all so horrifying I was forced to immediately go grab a beer just to pound it as I gazed out the window at my crew cab and Jeep, reminding myself that my life was not really quite over yet...just very very different now...
:)
Anybody else go through all that, especially with the first baby?

Tue May 20, 2008 6:59 am

I don't have a kid but I've seen those changes with my brother, who now has 2 boys, 1 6 year old and a 1 year old. When we used to hang out it would include, poker, beer, violent action movies, lots and lots of swearing. Now it still includes the beer and poker but now the movies are Monster's Inc. and Toy Story... Still lots of fun... He works 7 days a week so he can get everything needed and wanted for his 2 boys instead of working 7 days a week to supply his weed and booze... It's been an awesome change for him. His 2 boys love metal, so when we go out for a drive we're playing the rock, and their both throwing the horns rockin' out in the back seat....

Tue May 20, 2008 7:06 am

It will hit you, yet again, while you realize that you and the wife are still actively watching the Disney Channel after the kids go to bed.....

Tue May 20, 2008 7:34 am

When Jack was about 2 years old his Aunt & Uncle stopped by to see him for the first time! After oohing and awing & "he's so cute" we were standing outside saying our good-byes when we started hearing peep/peep/peep? Finally realized he'd STUFFED one of our laying hens into the trailer of his Tonka Toys 18 wheeler! :roll:

Tue May 20, 2008 8:13 am

i never thought id ever have kids....let alone be functional enough to raise them right, now i still drink and smoke but i dont stay out late, id rather be with my son and daughter than my friends most of the tim, and terrible vice is no longer an issue. i now try to keep my job instead of telling my boss ill f&ck him up. That is the hardest for me is to be tactful enough to get by with people when in the streets you just get shit done. One day ill be able to tell my bosses to never step foot in my neighborhood or else, [-X but till then i have to chill. 8)

Tue May 20, 2008 9:33 am

TeamSpatula wrote: perhaps most importantly, the cruel irony of the fact that here I had the house to myself, had already started the loud raucus rock n roll party, and then proceeded to do somthing so very un-rock n roll that I was forced to shudder at all the implications of where my life had come to and all these signs pointing at (gasp) adulthood, maturity, and several other dirty words...

I'd do a comparison between baby shit and beer shit, so far the opportunity has eluded me.

The Clash, "Death or Glory":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79iZy_DqoyI

Every cheap hood makes a bargain withg the world
Ends up makin' payments on a sofa and a girl!

(and)

Every gimmick hungry yob,
Diggin gold from rock 'n' roll
Grabs the mic to tell us
He'll die be fore he's sold

And check this out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KzyZkwOJHT8

What impressed me most in my teenage punk years was that we didn't bust it all apart. If we only knew what a complacent boring apathetic lot we'd become. 'Course I strive not to be complacent, boring and apathetic but then my complacent, boring and apathetic "peers" look at me like I got sumthin' growin' outta my head.

Oh, well.

Tue May 20, 2008 12:00 pm

I've got three kids and couldn't imagine life without any of them.

The 15 year old son has been more interested in playing guitar and making music with his cousins, than playing stupid video games. I was more than happy to help pay for musical instruments, lessons, etc. than to keep flushing money down the drain on video games.

The 10 year old daughter is also very musical, playing piano and violin. She spends way too much time on the Webkins website though. Fortunately she also loves soccer and softball and I get to help coach her teams every fall and spring.

The 2 year old daughter is really blooming now, talking up a storm and doing whatever she can to keep up with brother and sister. She loves helping Dad in the garage, is fascinated with tools and always wants to go for a ride in one of my "Bus-Dads".

Kids are great if you give them the time and love they need. I figure I'll never be lonely when I'm older with three of them spread across a wide age range.

Tue May 20, 2008 12:39 pm

Yesterday we were driving back from my seven year old daughter's softball game and I asked her if she wanted me to put something on the stereo in the car for the short drive home.

"Yes daddy. Ozzy Osbourne Crazy Train."

:D

Tue May 20, 2008 1:07 pm

Major Woody wrote: Yesterday we were driving back from my seven year old daughter's softball game and I asked her if she wanted me to put something on the stereo in the car for the short drive home.

"Yes daddy. Ozzy Osbourne Crazy Train."

:D

My kids keep asking for black sabbath iron man.

Tue May 20, 2008 1:30 pm

I love this topic. I've got twins due in september and am DEFINITELY excited about it but, at the same time, scared. Everyone says it will change your life and its the best thing that has happened to them. That part I can understand and can't wait to experience. I guess the part that scares me is just knowing what to do and doing it right.

Tue May 20, 2008 2:10 pm

dont worry about what is right 'cause all kids are different.....just make sure they are as happy as possible as much as possible......i fucked up with my daughter being too strict when she was little , but they are babies for a very short time! dont raise brats but raise joyfull, confident children. will they drive you crazy?...hell yeah, but if you dont raise them no one will. good luck.

Tue May 20, 2008 2:16 pm

Few years back my son comes home and wants to know if I've ever heard a song that starts Duh Duh Duh, Duh Duh Da Da.

I told him to hold on a sec, pulled out the album, gave him the cover to look at, put the record on the turn table and cranked it up.

I hadnt listened to Smoke on the Water in years!

Tue May 20, 2008 2:21 pm

TeamSpatula wrote: what terrible process sweet innocent babies use to transform something as clean and pure as mother's milk into something so chunkily terrible, in hideous shades ranging from putrid yellow, to foul muddy brown, to a green so vivid... It was all so horrifying I was forced to immediately go grab a beer

Wait till the kid is shitting and puking on you at the same time.

Remember: this kid is the biggest experiment you will ever get to perform. Had a friend whos mom taught him his alphabet before he got to school- from Z to A.

Tue May 20, 2008 4:36 pm

Yeah. I helped a bit with the first kid. Diapers were nothing fun, but we didn't do the cloth diaper thing either.

At some point at about 15 months, he managed to get some stomach virus that lingered for a while. He was incapable of keeping much food down, if any. They recommended Pedialyte to get fluids and nutrients in him, so we tried it even though he was still nursing. The end result was this unnaturally purple or pink milk curd vomit. I'd change a hundred diapers before trying to clean that mess up again.

Tue May 20, 2008 7:58 pm

:lol: Funny! Wait till you wake up one day and that baby is a parent of their own and you are, therefore, a "poppa". Time whips by, trust me. Enjoy it ALL...

...even the diapers that look like mustard. :x

At least then you'll get the satisfaction of saying "I told you so" and he/she doesn't have a comeback. :wink:

Wed May 21, 2008 10:24 am

I still abide by the WC Fields quote, "Childern are meant to be sold and not heard"
JiI

Wed May 21, 2008 10:35 am

porkchop wrote: It will hit you, yet again, while you realize that you and the wife are still actively watching the Disney Channel after the kids go to bed.....

:lol: Right On...the other night, my 9 yr. old son wanted to go hang out with his friends in the neighborhood. So, he popped up from watching SpongeBob and left. I proceeded to sit on the couch, beer in hand and take his place. My wife came over and flipped the TV off - and said.."Isn't it nice..no kids, no TV..just us?" to which I replied.."Hey...I was watching that"..

:wink:

What's scarey is when he decides to listen to AC/DC, Old KISS or Cash...THAT's when I feel old.

Wed May 21, 2008 11:56 am

JiI wrote: I still abide by the WC Fields quote, "Childern are meant to be sold and not heard"
JiI
Yup, you sure sound like a teacher. i used to really believe kids need to shut the f$ck up and listen , but they are kids and with my son i learned to have more apathy and realized he cant communicate nor understand me sometimes. i was gonna teach but L.A. unified has such a horrible beaurocracy that i left it to the birds!

Wed May 21, 2008 11:56 am

porkchop wrote: It will hit you, yet again, while you realize that you and the wife are still actively watching the Disney Channel after the kids go to bed.....

:lol:

Wed May 21, 2008 4:00 pm

Congrats on going the cloth diaper route, more work-- but way cheaper !!
I miss the young excited look on my kids face when they learn something new !! All the hard work pays off, we have a 20 & 21 year olds now, & they are great !! I do miss picking them up & holding them, but my 6 foot 200# son doesn't care for that so much.... :lol:
The best day when raising our kids was the day the diaper hamper went out the door !! :oops: