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Fri May 11, 2012 9:50 am

I rescued a wonderful 7month old puppy from the humane society a little over two weeks ago. He's my first dog and he really has been great for an untrained puppy.
I put a lot of thought into whether I could handle the huge commitment of owning a dog and in that respect it's been about what I expected. What has surprised me is I just don't care for being around him. I love hiking walk and jogging and I assumed adding a dog to these activities would make them better. Apparently it doesn't always work that way. I don't find playing with or petting the dog any fun. So far he's a lot higher maintenance and a lot less fun then my cat was... I'm getting afraid I might just be a cat person.

I plan on giving him at least the 30days recommended by the humane society before doing anything drastic but Does it make me a horrible person if I eventually decide to take him back simply because I don't care for having a dog?
Any advice on how to actually enjoy having a dog?

Fri May 11, 2012 10:14 am

If having a dog didn't make your tail wag from the minute you took him home, I would say for sure you're not a dog person. When you go to say, a friends house do you get down and greet the dog or think to yourself 'dam I hate the dog'?

That should tell you....

Fri May 11, 2012 10:28 am

Thankfully you didn't adopt a child. Your experience is exactly why I've refused to place parrots in homes where they don't fit (even if the potential owner got angry w/ my decision). Pets are not toys, and are a long term committment.
I wish more people would do the research and be honest with themselves or their situation before getting a pet (or having/adopting a child). Getting passed around in formative early life is usually not good for either. Do the dog and yourself a favor, and return it so he can hopefully be placed in the right home. I truly feel that if you need suggestions on how to "enjoy" a dog, owning one is not ever really going to be for you.

PS... obviously he's already been neglected or passed around if he's 7 mo.s old and is untrained. IMO, part ways now.

Fri May 11, 2012 11:39 am

Good call.

Take him back. There's no shame in not being a "dog person".

We had a cat stray up. Now I have 5 kittens. Blech. I'm not a cat person and don't like to even be around them. Want one? 2? 3? etc, etc.

Fri May 11, 2012 11:48 am

HankScorpio wrote: Does it make me a horrible person if I eventually decide to take him back simply because I don't care for having a dog?
If you don't care for having a dog around, you're already a horrible person. Take him back.

Fri May 11, 2012 11:49 am

HankScorpio wrote: What has surprised me is I just don't care for being around him. I love hiking walk and jogging and I assumed adding a dog to these activities would make them better. Apparently it doesn't always work that way. I don't find playing with or petting the dog any fun. So far he's a lot higher maintenance and a lot less fun then my cat was... I'm getting afraid I might just be a cat person...Any advice on how to actually enjoy having a dog?

As others have alluded to, I find this surprising. I can see not understanding the commitment and work involved in a dog before getting one home, but I'd think you would have only gotten a dog because you played with and enjoyed being around one owned by family or friends. It's good that you are honest and realized the mistake. Don't wait the full 30 days, it will only confuse and distress the dog after he's bonded with you.

Fri May 11, 2012 1:51 pm

take the dog back now - if you aren't 100% committed to the care and maintenance of the puppy, you don't deserve him....

we have two rescues (and two purebreds) and wouldn't consider giving any of them up because "so far he's a lot higher maintenance and a lot less fun"...

:roll:

Fri May 11, 2012 5:15 pm

100% + committment needed. I add to the take it back and almost immediately. It's not fair to the dog to stretch out a rejection. I'm feeling very sorry for that puppy. Doesn't sound like you are a dog person. Stick with cats. MHO

Fri May 11, 2012 7:33 pm

We get rescue dogs returned all the time. It's part of doing a rescue and it sucks but it's better than the alternatives. Take it back.

Fri May 11, 2012 9:20 pm

blankmange wrote: take the dog back now - if you aren't 100% committed to the care and maintenance of the puppy, you don't deserve him....

we have two rescues (and two purebreds) and wouldn't consider giving any of them up because "so far he's a lot higher maintenance and a lot less fun"...
:roll:
I never said I wasn't 100% committed to the care and maintenance of this dog! He is very well cared for. I'm working hard to create a good environment for him. I enrolled in the First available training course and ive been working with the humane society's behaviorist too. Also you miss quote me. He's higher maintenance and less fun than Than my cat was. I guess my message wasn't clear, I'm frustrated with the situation Because greater commitment has yet to show reward. I'm not considering returning him because he's a lot of work. I'm concerned because I feel our personalities and energy levels may be a poor match. I may not enjoy his company much but I do care very deeply for this dog.
My top priority is doing what is best for the dog. And until posting this, I've been fed a steady diet of "give it time." from friends, neighbors, my vet even said give it 3 months. However I have the same concern most of you expressed: if things don't work out the longer I wait the harder it will be on the dog.
I appreciate the advice even if it is a bit harsh.
Thank you

Fri May 11, 2012 9:35 pm

HankScorpio wrote: blankmange wrote: take the dog back now - if you aren't 100% committed to the care and maintenance of the puppy, you don't deserve him....

we have two rescues (and two purebreds) and wouldn't consider giving any of them up because "so far he's a lot higher maintenance and a lot less fun"...
:roll:
I never said I wasn't 100% committed to the care and maintenance of this dog! He is very well cared for. I'm working hard to create a good environment for him. I enrolled in the First available training course and ive been working with the humane society's behaviorist too. Also you miss quote me. He's higher maintenance and less fun than Than my cat was. I guess my message wasn't clear, I'm frustrated with the situation Because greater commitment has yet to show reward. I'm not considering returning him because he's a lot of work. I'm concerned because I feel our personalities and energy levels may be a poor match. I may not enjoy his company much but I do care very deeply for this dog.
My top priority is doing what is best for the dog. And until posting this, I've been fed a steady diet of "give it time." from friends, neighbors, my vet even said give it 3 months. However I have the same concern most of you expressed: if things don't work out the longer I wait the harder it will be on the dog.
I appreciate the advice even if it is a bit harsh.
Thank you

Try panting at him... that pant they do when they're not tired, but excited, is actually a laugh. It can perk a doggie up or calm him down if he's nervous/ agitated. Try it- it's almost a "ha-ha-ha" whispered or under your breath. Watch the dog light up.

Learn to "talk" to your dog, both in dog and people speak. They understand and "get" more than we like to give them credit for.

I'm thinking that the reason this may be disconcerting for you is that you are clueless with what you're exactly dealing with. Educate yourself.

Sat May 12, 2012 2:19 am

Not meaning to be harsh. I've had 3 rescue dogs each with it's own story. Simba chose me and although I wasn't smitten I took him. For the first month he was extremely apathetical. In hindsight, I think he was waiting to see if I would keep him. I just talked to him all the time, showed him love and 5 basic rules and I socialized socialized him first with humans then with their dogs. His history (4 years) was abuse and rejection several times over. Yes he was waiting for my committment and perseverance. Over the next 10 years he became loveable, playable, we were inseperable and he learned the joy of living. Very protective of me and happy in our life. Introduced him to tent camping and that was a fun development.

Yes it can take time but I knew I wasn't going to give up on him. I poured lots of love into him and we became a team.

It's just that your first post, it was like your heart was just not in it. Kids growth up and leave home, dogs stay forever and its a 24/7/365 day job come rain, shine, sleet, snow. Look deep into yourself and see if you have that committment. My companion is an integral part of my life.

Sat May 12, 2012 6:24 am

HankScorpio wrote: :::snip::

I plan on giving him at least the 30days recommended by the humane society before doing anything drastic but Does it make me a horrible person if I eventually decide to take him back simply because I don't care for having a dog?
Any advice on how to actually enjoy having a dog?

why did you take him if you wasn't ready for him?
dogs and kids are not something to have on the "fly" or because everyone else is doing it and it is cool to say you have one too.
you have to plan on at least 10-12 year commitment on a dog.....
if you are not ready for that, then you are not ready for a dog
so to answer your question, yes.

Sat May 12, 2012 7:06 am

Some people aren't "dog people", if you don't feel a bond or don't enjoy your dog, find it a home. Dogs need tons of love and will suffer if you're just going through the motions.

I doubt you're a horrible person if you actually worry that you may be one. Sort of how people who worry that they are crazy, never are. People love to criticize on the internet and this sort of thread is like chum to the sharks. Don't take all the hate to heart.

Sat May 12, 2012 8:39 am

Tram, my wife is a behavior consultant. I had to show her your post and she agreed that you are dead on! If you learn to speak dog the relationship has a better chance.

Mon May 14, 2012 5:39 pm

So I think a big part of this is just me panicing about a big change in my life.

Although walks are still fairly unpleasant I am seeing improvements that give me hope. I think neighbors who never tried leash training got me a bit too discouraged with comments like "my dog is 9 and he's still pulls me.". A week of work and my dog shows improvement. It may take years but I think walks could live up to my expectations.

Play time and "lap dog" time are still less promising. We're working on it but I believe we're going to have to work this out quickly because the longer we drag this out the Harder this will be on both of us. I am bonding with him even if I'm not enjoying this experience. I'd really like to foster him until a better home can be found but the humane society want him back in their kennel if I don't keep him.

Mon May 14, 2012 5:55 pm

it takes tons of time for sure. but that dog will be the only 'person' on this planet that is excited to see you when you come home! my dog is like astro from the jetsons every time i come home.

she is my best friend

keep working at it. imho, its worth it. i sort of felt the same way, but after a couple weeks, our dog adjusted and was happy we took her in

Mon May 14, 2012 6:09 pm

As a volunteer with a rescue group, take him back. NOW. Dogs aren't like people, they sense stress and negativity. If you are not happy, he\she will not be happy because they just want you happy. There's no shame in it, not everyone is a dog person.

...but I have to ask...your cat was FUN??

Mon May 14, 2012 6:20 pm

The one thing about a rescue of any age (but progressively harder the older the dog) is that they will test you to make sure you are going to stick it before they give you their heart. Always remember that they are a rescue for a reason and they don't soon forget why. I don't think anyone can tell you what to do. You've been given excellent advice from all directions. I can't imagine a 7 mth old pup not wanting cuddle and lap time, nor not wanting to be playful. Kids grow up and leave home, dogs don't. Make sure you have a 365, 24/7 X 10+ years committment come rain, sleet, or snow. I'm cheering for you but I'm not sure your heart is in this. Exactly WHY do you want a dog? Give all the reasons you can think. We dog lovers will not judge the need to be needed!

Wed May 16, 2012 9:30 am

Tram wrote:
Try panting at him... that pant they do when they're not tired, but excited, is actually a laugh. It can perk a doggie up or calm him down if he's nervous/ agitated. Try it- it's almost a "ha-ha-ha" whispered or under your breath. Watch the dog light up.

We are fostering a dog right now, our second foster dog since February, and I tried the "panting" thing. Nothing. No reaction at all. Oh well, it was worth a try, and my wife got a laugh out of it.