Speaking of Schlitz - Friday humor

[llamas1]

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a case of beer, any kind except Schlitz. The bartender says, "What's wrong with Schlitz, don't you like it?" The man says "I hate that shit. Last night I drank a whole case of Schlitz and blew chunks. The bartender says, "You drink a case of any beer and you're going to blow chunks." You don't understand said the man, "Chunks is my dog."

[wgargan]

o.k. prepare yourself for a lame joke.
what do you call a mushroom who buys you a drink?
A. a fungi to be with.

what do you call two sperm cells who got into a fight?
A. a gametophyte.

soory i dont have anything better off the top of my head, those were on the "wall-o-quotes" in a biology lab.
lc
_________________
Current ride:

1983.5 Watercooled Vanagon 'L' Automatic transmission

[Karl]

Sven says, "Yes sir, I did it three times last night with a 30 year old!"

Ole replies, "You're kidding, I can't even manage to do it once anymore, whats your secret?"

Sven replies, "Well, the secret is to eat lots of whole wheat bread."

Ole yumps up and rushes as fast as he can to the store. He tells the clerk, "I'd like four loaves of whole wheat bread."

The clerk says, "thats a lot of bread, It'll probably get hard before you're done eating it all!"

Ole says, "Damn! Does everyone know about this except me?"

[Rich]

Guy goes into a bar and orders 3 beers at the same time. The bartender thinks this unusual and askes the patron about it. The guy says: "I have 2 brothers that live in different parts of the world. Since we can't be together, we all order 3 beers to remind us of one another."

This goes on for several months until one day the guy orders only 2 beers. The bartender says" Geez, I'm sorry, did one of your brothers pass away?" "No," the guy says, "I told the wife I'd quit drinking."
Rich
'72 Westy