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finster
Samba Member
Joined: May 26, 2012
Posts: 10574
Location: not far from the madding crowd
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 Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2025 9:34 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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https://www.facebook.com/reel/720523791006828
_________________
"we're here on Earth to fart around" kurt vonnegut
nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect... |
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mrinnovation1
Samba Member
Joined: June 11, 2025
Posts: 297
Location: IL
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2025 9:43 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| I met my wife in January at work. We started dating in August. We were engaged in December. We were married the following May. Total span was about 17 months. Fast forward 46 years and 4 months and here we are. She is the love of my life and our love is stronger now than 46 years ago. |
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pondoras box
Samba Member
Joined: March 22, 2004
Posts: 1933
Location: Warren, PA
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2025 10:19 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| Abscate wrote: |
| pondoras box wrote: |
| Abscate wrote: |
| pondoras box wrote: |
Women think and respond to stimulus emotionally and men logically. We perceive the world around us very differently. There are two really good books that will help you navigate this difference.
For men it’s the care and feeding of your wife
For women it’s called (wait for it) yep you guessed it the care and feeding of your husband.
It explains a lot of what is in this thread. |
That’s some pretty dark Project 2025 crap there. The spectrum of emotional-logical stimulus response is probably 50x broader than any difference between genders. Following the hue and cry of the Cray cray right to return the 50s is an express pass to an InCel life.
Men logically buy pickup trucks to commute 10 miles to their job at Home Depot. Got it. |
Read the book and THEN tell me I’m wrong. |
Get back to me after 70 years of life and 40 years of marriage. |
Old doesn’t make you wise, by the way I’m not far behind you. Most people get married at it’s the finish line but it’s the start. You quit learning you’ve quit, you think you’re done learning and you’ve become complacent. My parents divorced after 50+ years of marriage. One too many times of giving in to my mother’s whims. Not fighting and always giving 100% is not always a good thing.
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Looking for anything from Hal Casey Motors out of Hamburg New York, from license plate surrounds to matchbooks.
1961 23 Window (Bobo)
1965 11 Window (Zelda). https://www.thesamba.com/vw/forum/viewtopic.php?t=563183
1965 13 Window (Lucas)
1957 Oval ragtop
1960 hardtop
1964 hardtop
1965 hardtop (Arschloch)
1973 standard bug (Dirty Gertie)
https://www.thesamba.com/vw/forum/viewtopic.php?t=804912
1988 Cabriolet VR6 conversion |
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mrinnovation1
Samba Member
Joined: June 11, 2025
Posts: 297
Location: IL
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2025 10:40 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| Giving 100% is in effort. Sometimes, that 100% is taking control. Sometimes, that 100% is giving in but its always 100%. My wife and I don't split the bills down the middle. The money is from both of us but I pay the bills. We share the groceries but my wife does the cooking (unless outside). We share household chores but the 100% effort is still there. A lot of this is spontaneous. Just do it! It works. |
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Abscate
Samba Member
Joined: October 05, 2014
Posts: 24467
Location: NYC/Upstate/ROW
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2025 12:43 pm Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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Once you reach 20 years your chance of divorcing is very low, 95% of divorces occur before this anniversary. I suspect acrimonious divorce is even rarer, there are financial advatages to divorce in the US on retirement.
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ALLWAGONS
Samba Member
Joined: June 03, 2000
Posts: 4740
Location: Pasadena CA/DTLA soon China
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2025 12:50 pm Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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The saying goes, "happy wife, Happy Life" I call BS, Happy Me, Happy life. I am happy with my wife. She is happy with me, we both compliment each other. I ALWAYS let her know when I don't agree with her and the other way around. We wake up laughing and go to sleep laughing. It's NOT a respect thing, it's a love thing after 37 years!
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I'd be UNSTOPPABLE if not for Law Enforcement and PHYSICS.
I recycle old cars and parts, other than when I rot, that's as Green as I am going to get.
Thanks to my Tesla driving neighbors, I feel more relaxed driving my SUBURBAN and old VW's.
Everything sounds good on paper! |
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hobthebob
Samba Member
Joined: December 08, 2021
Posts: 488
Location: Austin, TX
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| Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2025 4:37 pm Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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Been together with my wife now for 14 years, and one thing I've learned is that sometimes it's okay to take the lead, and sometimes it's good to let her take the lead. The wisdom is knowing when either choice is best. The leader doesn't always have to make the decisions, but the leader is always the one held accountable when the decisions made were in error.
Also, single income family, all bills and bank accounts are together. Same last name, both kids share the same last name as well. Unity within the family is reflected in the choices we make daily to be on one accord and to be literally one with each other. The world calls this toxic enmeshment, and we call it a happy family. Notice so many in the world getting divorces all the time? |
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Abscate
Samba Member
Joined: October 05, 2014
Posts: 24467
Location: NYC/Upstate/ROW
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| Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2025 2:02 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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We put all our money in one place except 401ks. We have both had phases of bring sole income provider for family, business startup,but have been lucky not to be out of work for more than a few months. I went independent in 2010.
We deposit into the joint and withdraw from same. We still live pretty frugally, I get yelled at if I swap in the new shampoo bottle while she is still using it with water to get out the stuff stuck on the sides. I probably wouldn’t spend more than $500 without letting her know , outside a gift.
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oprn
Samba Member
Joined: November 13, 2016
Posts: 15268
Location: Western Canada
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| Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2025 4:47 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| Abscate wrote: |
| Once you reach 20 years your chance of divorcing is very low, 95% of divorces occur before this anniversary. I suspect acrimonious divorce is even rarer, there are financial advatages to divorce in the US on retirement. |
A few years back the Canadian average marriage was 8 years.
Yes here too there is a financial advantage to divorce in old age. Some people just maintain two mailing addresses to get that.
My wife is working part time still and 2 years ago Canada pension informed her that due to her low income she qualified for a subsidy which she applied for. This summer they sent me a notice that due to my wife's income they had overpaid me and clawed back a big chunk of cash!
Give with one hand and take it back with the other! Might look into the separate address thing... a divorce after 40 some years seems ridiculous. We are just starting to get along!
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Our cars get old, we get old but driving an old VW never gets old! |
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finster
Samba Member
Joined: May 26, 2012
Posts: 10574
Location: not far from the madding crowd
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| Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2025 6:30 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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available at all good book outlets...
_________________
"we're here on Earth to fart around" kurt vonnegut
nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect... |
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Cusser
Samba Member
Joined: October 02, 2006
Posts: 33512
Location: Hot Arizona
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| Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2025 6:57 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| Cusser wrote: |
Mrs. Cusser does have two horses, and uses my 1970 VW to drag the horse arena !!! Yes, every spring the horse arena sprouts tumbleweeds....
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| Abscate wrote: |
| Watch out for stumps. |
Too late !!! You should've warned her earlier !!!! Fortunately there was no damage; she actually ran over a tree stump that had fallen off her drag harrow, was weighting it down, and likely was on her phone and simply ran over it on the next loop. You married guys will understand this....
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1970 VW (owned since 1972) and 1971 VW Convertible (owned since 1976), second owner of each. The '71 now has the 1835 engine, swapped from the '70. Second owner of each. 1988 Mazda B2200 truck, 1998 Frontier, 2014 Yukon, 2004 Frontier King Cab. All manual transmission except for the Yukon. http://www.thesamba.com/vw/forum/album_page.php?pic_id=335294 http://www.thesamba.com/vw/forum/album_page.php?pic_id=335297 |
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ALLWAGONS
Samba Member
Joined: June 03, 2000
Posts: 4740
Location: Pasadena CA/DTLA soon China
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| Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2025 11:57 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| Abscate wrote: |
We put all our money in one place except 401ks. We have both had phases of bring sole income provider for family, business startup,but have been lucky not to be out of work for more than a few months. I went independent in 2010.
We deposit into the joint and withdraw from same. We still live pretty frugally, I get yelled at if I swap in the new shampoo bottle while she is still using it with water to get out the stuff stuck on the sides. I probably wouldn’t spend more than $500 without letting her know , outside a gift. |
Money? what is that? is it the thing that you pay bills with? If I or her lived by ourselves, she or I would still pay bills or have to cook food or clean up the house!! why do people think its special when one or the other pays or does things? if there is a balance, we should ALL do our part. It's good you guys have it figured out.
_________________
I'd be UNSTOPPABLE if not for Law Enforcement and PHYSICS.
I recycle old cars and parts, other than when I rot, that's as Green as I am going to get.
Thanks to my Tesla driving neighbors, I feel more relaxed driving my SUBURBAN and old VW's.
Everything sounds good on paper! |
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Shonandb 
Samba Member
Joined: January 12, 2019
Posts: 2298
Location: Vancouver, BC
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| Posted: Tue Dec 23, 2025 2:13 pm Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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My wife sent this to me today from one of the sites she follows.
She can't stand the idea of me waiting until the last minute to buy Christmas presents but I know what I am going to buy and don't stress about it.
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76 Westy with a 2.5L Subaru SOHC + Vanagon (010) Automatic Transaxle
Build & Trip Thread: https://www.thesamba.com/vw/forum/viewtopic.php?t=758760
Previous 1973 Panel Bus:
Click to view image
Last edited by Shonandb on Tue Dec 23, 2025 2:24 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Xevin
Samba Member
Joined: January 08, 2014
Posts: 9095
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| Posted: Tue Dec 23, 2025 2:23 pm Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| Shonandb wrote: |
My wife sent this to me today from one of the sites she follows.
She can't stand the idea of me waiting to the last minute to buy Christmas presents but I know what I am going to buy and don't stress about it. |
Let her know you already got a gift for her at the CIP1 Boxing Day presale  
_________________
Keep on Busin'
| 67rustavenger wrote: |
GFY's Xevin and VW_Jimbo!  |
| Clatter wrote: |
| Damn that Xevin... |
| skills@eurocarsplus wrote: |
I respect Xevin and he's a turd  |
| SGKent wrote: |
My God! Xevin and I 100% agree  |
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Abscate
Samba Member
Joined: October 05, 2014
Posts: 24467
Location: NYC/Upstate/ROW
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| Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2025 3:51 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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Xatie just sent me a gift certificate for new tires, just sayin….
What do 365 days of sex and a steel belted radial have in common?
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Glenn
Mr. 010
Joined: December 25, 2001
Posts: 80546
Location: Sneaking up behind you
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| Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2025 4:45 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| Abscate wrote: |
| What do 365 days of sex and a steel belted radial have in common? |
It's when the rubber hits the road.
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Glenn
74 Beetle Specs | 74 Beetle Restoration | 2180cc Engine
"You may not get what you pay for, but you always pay for what you get"
Member #1009
#BlueSquare
עַם יִשְׂרָאֵל חַי |
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Da TOW'D
Samba Member
Joined: December 25, 2005
Posts: 1402
Location: Bella Coma Canada
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| Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2025 11:56 am Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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a good year
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'57 type 1 Blackberry
'58 SC Ruf
'62 type 3 Notch
'69 Karmann Ghia Convertible (new project)
'92 Eurovan Willy
'99 Eurovan Winnie
and NUTS |
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67rustavenger
Samba Member
Joined: February 24, 2015
Posts: 11607
Location: Oregon
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| Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2025 12:18 pm Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| Glenn wrote: |
| Abscate wrote: |
| What do 365 days of sex and a steel belted radial have in common? |
It's when the rubber hits the road. |
I see what you did there! 
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I have learned over the years.
Cheap parts are gonna disappoint you.
Buy Once, Cry Once!
There's never enough time to do it right the first time. But there's always enough time to do it thrice.
GFY's Xevin and VW_Jimbo!
2003 Astrovan? GFYS again, Xevin!
Don't let your bad ideas remain, ideas! |
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mrinnovation1
Samba Member
Joined: June 11, 2025
Posts: 297
Location: IL
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| Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2025 1:44 pm Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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They both have wear indicators?
Last edited by mrinnovation1 on Sat Dec 27, 2025 1:58 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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mrinnovation1
Samba Member
Joined: June 11, 2025
Posts: 297
Location: IL
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| Posted: Sat Dec 27, 2025 1:48 pm Post subject: Re: New Topic: "You married guys will understand this" |
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| They can both be overinflated? |
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